“Redeemed how I love to proclaim it”, flows from my lips easily these days. This hasn’t always been the way. The past couple of years have been a journey of seeking and finding God. Lest you think this about the work I’m doing, it is God’s precious work in me.
A few years ago, I found myself lost. Looking back now, I can say I was so in front of my face that I slowly lost the sight of God. I think it’s typical that we get in-between God and His light shining in our lives, but I had managed to make my desires so large that even the smallest amount of light couldn’t seep through.
In the wake of my selfishness was a fractured marriage, lost friendships, and a hasty move across state. I had decided that God’s mercy had run out for me, and I was going to find a different way. It was there I found myself in the wilderness. For almost a year I didn’t hear from God, I didn’t care to hear from God, and I wanted what I wanted, and nothing else would do.
Life wasn’t just about things not working out. It was painfully quiet. You know the type of quiet where you hear ringing in your ears. Silent and lonely-lost without my heavenly Father. I stepped out of His protection and in his loving kindness he let me walk into the wilderness. I began to live a scared and panicked life. I was constantly afraid of losing my job because that is where I put my hope, and then one day I did.
While I was actively running from God, but after a while I found myself attending church and serving on a worship team. One evening a woman on the worship team, truly blessed with a beautiful voice, began singing: “Come to Me all who are weary, and I will give you rest.” Tears began to fall in an almost uncontrollable way. I was weary, tired, and my strength was gone. As she began singing the chorus, “I have been waiting for you here.” I felt God speak, no I heard God speak and he said, “I’m leading you out of the wilderness, but you must acknowledge who I am, take my hand, and never give up.”
I eagerly accepted His invitation and the silence, well, it was finally gone. What remained was the ever loving voice of my Father. Some time passed and God took me through a journey in Hosea. Hosea was the impetus that healed the part of my heart that was damaged from leaving the bounds of my marriage. In Hosea I was gifted with this scripture:
But once she has nothing, I’ll be able to get through to her. “I’ll entice her and lead her out into the wilderness where we can be alone, and I’ll speak right to her heart and try to win her back.” (Hosea 2:14)
What will it take for you, dear friend, to stop running from God -to stop looking at your relationship with Him as a chore, something to mark off your to-do list? Laying down your desires at the feet of Jesus may seem impossible, but when you trust Jesus with what you want in your life, you will be pleasantly surprised. Jesus wants to provide, heal, and love you. You may want a lot of things but there is nothing that beats the love of your Savior. Take it from me.
We are the redeemed, redeemed of our past, present, and future so that we may know Him intimately. Psalm 85:8 says, “I will hear what the True God—the Eternal—will say, for He will speak peace over His people, peace over those who faithfully follow Him.” I encourage you to spend time, being quiet with Jesus and watch how throughout your day, you can see Him holding your hand.
Our hope is in the lord, dear ones. Don’t let yourself or anyone else get in the way of God’s light shining on your face!
Vanessa Page is the founder and author of the blog A Journey to God. She has been married for 16 years to hear best friend, David and has three children ages 5, 10, and 16. She works as a technical and freelance writer, enjoys leading worship at church, and spending time with her precious family. Above it all, Vanessa is His and He is hers.
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Have you had a time in your life where you were blocking God’s light in your life? Did you enjoy today’s guest post? Leave Vanessa a comment and share it with others.