The Unlikely Wedding Anniversary

Every year, as the Christmas, New Year and Valentines celebrations take a back seat, my husband and I await our own special day.   the seventh of March marks the day we wedded;  the day we became husband and wife and were whisked away to our happily ever after.  It’s a memory deeply etched in the petals of our hearts.

This year, our anniversary was particularly special, it was our fifth. We were looking forward to it with great anticipation.  We survived the ‘teething’ years of marriage where we had faced both internal and external challenges that had threatened our union. With five years under our belt, the scent of a new and refreshing chapter in our marriage was almost tangible and we were eager to usher it in with some pomp and color.

We pondered, together and individually. Was it going to be a dinner or a getaway? What gift was I going to surprise my husband with? And what was he going to get me? I mused. My dream list was probably a little over the board, but I did not mind. I was excited. Five years ago, I had said yes to this wonderful man, he was worth so much more.

But we had something else coming our way! A week to the day, I started feeling unwell.  It did not seem a big deal and so we walked round the block to see a doctor. Upon treatment, things moved from bad to worse. My system rejected the drugs and their expulsion was most painful. We ran some more tests and I opted to get injections rather than swallow tablets. For the next few days, I was in the worst pain of my life.  I had never used the word excruciating to describe any pain before, not even while healing from surgery.  But I found myself telling my husband how excruciating the pain was.
Within days I become very weak as I continued to expel food.  I had sleepless nights and the most uncomfortable days.  I would run out of breath simply talking or praying, yet I needed to strengthen myself in prayer, and am talkative too.

For a moment there, I forgot how it felt to be well and kicking.  I missed my daily routine that included homeschooling our two wonderful children, playing with the first grader, preparing lunch and typing away on my very small computer, which at that point felt so much heavier.  I missed making meals for my family and preparing my husband to work.

So much had changed within such a short period, and then again, so much had been revealed about my marriage, something that I came to appreciate from the depths of my heart.  I was truly in a beautiful marriage, married to a selfless, loving and caring man.

For my husband, it was the most demanding time as he shared himself between me, the children, the house and his work.  He cooked, cleaned, supervised, went to work and took me for my jabs.

I watched him get up at five in the morning to prepare a much needed mug of porridge for me.  He sat with me at night, praying over me when the pain intensified.  He lovingly massaged my numb feet and went out at night to buy me what I thought or felt my tummy would accept.  Through it all, I never felt a need to worry about anything, I did not need to.

It was a trying time physically, emotionally and spiritually.  But Joseph, my darling husband showered me with love and care that made my lowest moments manageable.

And so, our anniversary date came and went.  So did our plans to celebrate it (as my medical bills had ‘eaten away’ into our dinner and flowers).  But I had a bigger cause for celebration, not with chocolates and flowers, dinners and getaways, but with words and actions that money cannot buy.  I needed to celebrate my husband.  I needed to celebrate the love we share, the compassion and the care that he fully expressed during those sickly days. I needed to celebrate the sacrifices he made to minimize my pain and keep me worry free. The sleepless nights when he sat up to comfort me and prayed for me until I slept off peacefully.  Oh, how grateful I am! How wide my eyes opened to see the gift of God that he is!

And so, even though we did not get to celebrate as we had planned to, I made sure that my husband knew how grateful I was to be married to him.  How appreciative I was for all that he had done for me and how thankful I was to God, who did not bring me the sickness, but all the same used it for our good as we shared each other more and grew closer at such a low time.  Deep down we knew and felt that we had something beautiful to celebrate, a marriage born of God that overcomes the world.

As the book of Genesis concludes, Joseph comforts his brothers by saying these words; “But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive. (Genesis 50:20)

Even though my husband still wants us to do something special (which am all for) I feel so blessed already.  It is an experience that has brought me to place of total commitment to my husband and marriage, renewed my love for him, and further assured me of his love for me and of the grace of God upon our lives. Truly, what the enemy meant for evil, God turned around for our good!

ABOUT CAROLYNE



Carolyne Destiny is a life coach at The Coach House and editor of Life by Design Magazine. She spends her nights dreaming of a perfect world and her days writing about it. She is married to an adoring husband Joseph, also a life coach and designer. They have two children, Kairos and Zoe, an actor and a chef respectively (when they grow up!)
You can connect with her on Facebook; carolyne destiny or on Twitter @carolynedestiny. She blogs at Life by Design.