A few months ago, I was talking to a friend who was sad over a boy. This potential interest had told her in front of an entire group of people that he wasn’t into her, and he’d said it in an arrogant, uncaring way. Such a gentleman, I know. I remember seeing the sad in her eyes and the brave smile as she shrugged it off and said that it was fine, she’d get over the insensitive and humiliating way he’d communicated his feelings to her.
But I knew. She felt small. She felt unwanted. She felt ugly.
I knew how she felt because I’ve been there.
We’ve all been there.
There will always be people who will make you feel unbeautiful. Like the drunk guy who was taking a picture of us during a night out and started yelling at me, “Conceal the muffin top! Conceal the muffin top!” (I never wore the shirt again and ended up donating it). Or the salesclerk who bypassed the smalls and mediums and pulled out the largest size in stock (XL) and said it looked like it would fit me. Ouch. Those memories still sting because I remember feeling unattractive and undesirable. I didn’t feel beautiful.
To my precious friend, and to all of my girls who have ever felt ugly or small because of what someone said or did, this is what I have to say to you:
You are beautiful in spite of how they made you feel.
You are beautiful.
Repeat after me: I am beautiful.
I know that we’ll have those days when you look in the mirror and spend fifteen minutes trying notto pick at a new blemish (where did that come from?),not to compare your stomach with the chiseled abs of Kate Upton,notto wish that your boobs were smaller/larger. Women are awful at honing in on their flaws and ignoring their best features.
The annual Victoria’s Secret show is the worst – tons of gorgeous models with waistlines, long legs, flat stomachs, perfect hair, seductive eyes…and with every wishful look and coveted glance at them, my self esteem takes another hit.
Not pretty enough.
Not thin enough.
Not tall enough.
Not sexy enough.
Not beautiful enough.
Youare enough.Iam enough.And on the days when I feel my worst, my ugliest, my least attractive, I can be reassured that I am made in God’s image, perfect in spite of myself. He has created me to be his own child, radiant and beautiful. A princess.
“They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces were not ashamed.”
Jennifer is a firm believer in ice cream, koala bears, dancing in the rain, gummy bears, and chocolate. She believes that life is too short to eat bad food and didn’t learn how to ride a bicycle until she was 21. She is recent college graduate who grew up in California, moved to Alabama, attended college in Tennessee, and now lives in Shanghai, China working in education consulting. Her favorite Bible verse is Esther 4:14: “For who knows whether you have come into the kingdom for such a time as this?” because she believes that every day is a new opportunity to live in God’s purpose, even when the future is uncertain. She blogs at When in Doubt, Sparkle.